Spoilers ahead!
Now that was a good episode. Maybe one of the best! Slightly clunky in a few exposition parts ("remember the time I poisoned my husband?"), but considering the changed nature of the landscape following this episode, and how deftly it brings us full circle from the very first episode of the series, it's easy to overlook a few stumbles.
The things we do for everything. |
Kudos, Littlefinger. That's some nice long term scheming.
I now pronounce you: better than your brother. |
In Meereen, everyone is good and cleaned up (except, again, Ser Jorah, still unshaven) after their successful victory. Jorah has good news and bad news though. And he's obviously taken some managing relationship courses because he knows how to deliver constructive criticism the middle management way- by using the sandwich method!
First, take a slice of good news bread:
Hey Khalessi, Joffrey is dead! That means there's dissent within the kingdom.
But then; the meat of criticism:
Hey Khaleesi- remember all those places you liberated? Well, the slavers have taken over again. Everyone's saying the Mother of Dragons ain't such a liberator after all - the PR department are losing their minds. It's pretty bad.
And to complete the constructive criticism sandwich you add one more piece of good news bread:
Hey, Khalessi- you now have enough men (9300), enough boats (93) and enough dragons (3) to take King's Landing. And maybe the rest of Westeros, if you're lucky.
Jorah serves it up and..bam:
Instead of launching an invasion on Westeros, Khaleesi decides to take some time to "rule" the lands she has already conquered. She's working on improving her leadership skills before taking the next step in career progression. Tick that 'satisfactory' box on her performance review.
E-book coming soon. |
Hey Khalessi, Joffrey is dead! That means there's dissent within the kingdom.
But then; the meat of criticism:
Hey Khaleesi- remember all those places you liberated? Well, the slavers have taken over again. Everyone's saying the Mother of Dragons ain't such a liberator after all - the PR department are losing their minds. It's pretty bad.
And to complete the constructive criticism sandwich you add one more piece of good news bread:
Hey, Khalessi- you now have enough men (9300), enough boats (93) and enough dragons (3) to take King's Landing. And maybe the rest of Westeros, if you're lucky.
Jorah serves it up and..bam:
Instead of launching an invasion on Westeros, Khaleesi decides to take some time to "rule" the lands she has already conquered. She's working on improving her leadership skills before taking the next step in career progression. Tick that 'satisfactory' box on her performance review.
Tywin and Cersei have a heart to heart, organising Tommen's marriage to Margeary (that was fast) in two weeks, Cersei's marriage to Loras (in a month) and the reasons this is so important. Laying out quite bluntly what had been alluded to regularly through the show- that the Lannisters are woefully in debt to the Iron Bank of Braavos and without the help of the Tyrells, they won't be in power very long. After all, they've mined no gold in three years (bastards probably didn't even pay mining taxes when they were), it's all on credit.
Arya and the Hound (place of pride as last on her doomed men list) take a brief respite in the countryside to sleep, practice sword fighting and say 'cunt' a bit more. Also, the Hound thinks Braavosi sword fighting sucks.
Brienne and Podrick get off to a rocky start, what with his lack of riding skills, lack of meal prepping skills (he stomps a burning rabbit rather than throwing it in the creek that is just there) and reluctance to accept his release from the oath of squireship. It's only when he happens to mention that put a spear through the back of Kings Guard's head at the Battle of Blackwater that Brienne sees his true value. She asks him to help remove her armour. It's as close to an ohhhh as Game of Thrones gets.
A face only a prostitute could love and love and love... |
Jon and his men are at Craster's Keep. Just like that. It's thrilling that some of this stuff is happening so swiftly, after four years of "winter is coming" and dragons gradually getting bigger, I love that the show just pushed straight ahead with this storyline. Locke proves himself adept at moving around unnoticed, spying out the location of Bran and his crew in a small hut on the grounds.
You can tell way more about a person from their eHarmony profile pic than the profile alone. |
And so Craster's Keep is burnt to the ground as Bran, the (suddenly) reinvigorated Jojen, Meera and Hodor head back on the trail in search of the three eyed raven and the weirwood tree. But at least Jon reunites with his direwolf. One more ohhhh moment.
I almost forgot: Lysa expects Sansa to marry her weird son Robin. Gross. That probably won't happen though will it? I mean, Lysa is sure to 'trip' and fall through the moon door any minute, yeah? And then the conveniently widowed Littlefinger will simply marry Sansa. Nothing to worry about!
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